英語閱讀英文小笑話

經典英語笑話故事閱讀

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英語笑話是民族文化不可或缺的一部分。透過笑話我們可以看到一個民族的生存環境、生活方式、社會關係和心理特徵等等。小編精心收集了經典英語笑話故事,供大家欣賞學習!

經典英語笑話故事閱讀
  經典英語笑話故事:Roses for My Wife

On the way home one night, I spotted some fresh-cut roses outside a florist's shop. After selecting a dozen and entering the shop, I was greeted by a young saleswoman.

"Are these for your wife, sir?" she asked.

"Yes," I said.

"For her birthday?" she asked.

"No," I replied.

"For your anniversary?"

"No," I said again.

As I pocketed my change and headed toward the door, the young woman called out, "I hope she forgives you."

給妻子的玫瑰

一天晚上回家的路上,我看到一家花店外面有一些剛剪下來的玫瑰。我挑了一打,走進店裏,一個年輕的女售貨員跟我打了個招呼。

“先生,這些是送給你妻子的嗎?”她問道。

“是的,”我說。

“她的生日?”她問。

“不是,”我回答。

“你們的結婚紀念日?”

“不是,”我又答道。

當我將找回的錢裝進口袋,朝門口走去時,那年輕的女人衝我喊道:“希望她能原諒你。”

  經典英語笑話故事:Clarinet

When I played with a symphony orchestra, our union reached an agreement with a major airline about which instruments we could carry on board, and which had to be shipped as luggage. A cellist was dismayed to find that his delicate, expensive wood instrument was consigned to the rougher handling and cold temperatures of the baggage hold.

He neatly solved the problem. Cello in hand, he approached the flight attendant at the gate and asked, "May I bring my clarinet on board?" Scanning her list, she replied, "Clarinets are okay. Have a good trip," and, smiling, waved him on.

單簧管

我在一個交響樂團演奏時,我們樂團與一家大航空公司達成協議,哪些樂器可以帶上飛機,哪些樂器要作爲行李託運。一個大提琴手驚愕地發現他那精緻、昂貴的木質樂器竟要託運,經受行李艙內的低溫以及野蠻的裝缷。

他乾淨利落地解決了這個問題。他手裏拿着大提琴,走到門口的空中小姐跟前,問道:“我可以將我單簧管帶上飛機嗎?”她檢視了一下單子,答道,“單簧管可以。祝你旅途愉快。”然後微笑着揮手讓他進去了。

  經典英語笑話故事:Asking for a Raise

At the radio station where I worked, the manager called me into his office to preview a new sound-effects package we were considering purchasing. He closed the door so we wouldn't bother people in the outer office.

After listening to a few routine sound effects, we started playing around with low moans, maniacal screams, hysterical laughter, pleading and gunshots. When I finally opened the door and passed the manager's secretary, she looked up and inquired, "Asking for a raise again?"

要求加薪

我在一家電臺工作。經理把我叫進他的辦公室,讓我預試一下我們準備購買的一套新的音響效果設備。他關上門,以免打擾外面辦公室的人。

聽了幾個常規的音響效果後,我們開始試聽低聲的呻吟,狂亂的尖叫,歇斯底里的大笑,哀求逺和槍聲。最後我開門出去,從經理祕書旁邊經過時,她擡起頭問道:“又要求加薪了?”

  經典英語笑話故事:SleePing Pills

Bob was having trouble getting to sleep at night. He went to see his doctor, who prescribed some extra-strong sleeping pills.

Sunday night Bob took the pills, slept well and was awake before he heard the alarm. He took his time getting to the office, strolled in and said to his boss: "I didn't have a bit of trouble getting up this morning."

"That's fine," roared the boss, "but where were you Monday and Tuesday?"

安眠藥

鮑勃晚上失眠。他去看醫生,醫生給他開了一些強力安眠藥。

星期天晚上鮑勃吃了藥,睡得很好,在鬧鐘響之前就醒了過來。他到了辦公室,遛達進去,對老闆說:“我今天早上起牀一點麻煩都沒有。”

“好啊!”老闆吼道,“那你星期一和星期二到哪兒去了?”

  經典英語笑話故事:Sleeping Pills

Bob was having trouble getting to sleep at night. He went to see his doctor, who prescribed some extra-strong sleeping pills.

Sunday night Bob took the pills, slept well and was awake before he heard the alarm. He took his time getting to the office, strolled in and said to his boss: "I didn't have a bit of trouble getting up this morning."

"That's fine," roared the boss, "but where were you Monday and Tuesday?"

安眠藥

鮑勃晚上失眠。他去看醫生,醫生給他開了一些強力安眠藥。

星期天晚上鮑勃吃了藥,睡得很好,在鬧鐘響之前就醒了過來。他到了辦公室,遛達進去,對老闆說:“我今天早上起牀一點麻煩都沒有。”

“好啊!”老闆吼道,“那你星期一和星期二到哪兒去了?”


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