諾貝爾文學經典:《寵兒》第4章Part 9

Nine years without the fingers or the voice of Baby Suggs was too much. And words whispered inthe keeping room were too little. The butter-smeared face of a man God made none sweeter thandemanded more: an arch built or a robe sewn. Some fixing ceremony. Sethe decided to go to theClearing, back where Baby Suggs had danced in sunlight.
Before 124 and everybody in it had closed down, veiled over and shut away; before it had become the plaything of spirits and the home of the chafed, 124 had been a cheerful, buzzing house whereBaby Suggs, holy, loved, cautioned, fed, chastised and soothed. Where not one but two potssimmered on the stove; where the lamp burned all night long. Strangers rested there while childrentried on their shoes. Messages were left there, for whoever needed them was sure to stop in oneday soon. Talk was low and to the point — for Baby Suggs, holy, didn't approve of extra.
"Everything depends on knowing how much," she said, and "Good is knowing when to stop."
It was in front of that 124 that Sethe climbed off a wagon, her newborn tied to her chest, and feltfor the first time the wide arms of her mother-in-law, who had made it to Cincinnati. Who decidedthat, because slave life had "busted her legs, back, head, eyes, hands, kidneys, womb and tongue,"she had nothing left to make a living with but her heart — which she put to work at once.
Accepting no title of honor before her name, but allowing a small caress after it, she became anunchurched preacher, one who visited pulpits and opened her great heart to those who could use it.
In winter and fall she carried it to AME's and Baptists, Holinesses and Sanctifieds, the Church ofthe Redeemer and the Redeemed. Uncalled, unrobed, un anointed, she let her great heart beat intheir presence. When warm weather came, Baby Suggs, holy, followed by every black man,woman and child who could make it through, took her great heart to the Clearing — a wide-openplace cut deep in the woods nobody knew for what at the end of a path known only to deer andwhoever cleared the land in the first place. In the heat of every Saturday afternoon, she sat in theclearing while the people waited among the trees. After situating herself on a huge flat-sided rock,Baby Suggs bowed her head and prayed silently. The company watched her from the trees.

整整九年沒有貝比·薩格斯的手指和聲音，這太過分了。而且，僅僅在起居室裏低語也太不夠了。一張臉上塗滿了牛油，上帝創造的那個男人可絲毫不比她的非分之求更甜蜜：一道築起的拱門，或者一件縫好的禮袍。某種固有的儀式。塞絲決定到“林間空地”去，那裏，貝比·薩格斯曾在陽光中舞蹈。
在124號和它裏面的每個人一起關閉、掩藏和隔絕之前，在它成爲鬼魂的玩物和憤怒的家園之前，它曾是一所生機勃勃、熱鬧非凡的房子，聖貝比·薩格斯在那裏愛、告誡、供養、懲罰和安慰他人。那裏，不是一隻、而是兩隻鍋在爐火上噝噝作響；那裏，燈火徹夜通明。陌生人在那裏歇腳的時候，孩子們試着他們的鞋子。口信留在那裏，因爲等待口信的人不久就會到那裏過訪。談話聲很低而且點到即止———因爲聖貝比·薩格斯不贊成廢話。
“什麼都靠分寸，”她說，“好就好在適可而止。”
就是在那個124號跟前，胸前綁着新生兒的塞絲爬下一輛大車，第一次感受她的婆婆敞開的懷抱。貝比是先期抵達辛辛那提的，她認定，由於奴隸生活“摧毀了她的雙腿、後背、腦袋、眼睛、雙手、腎臟、子宮和舌頭”，她什麼都不剩了，只能靠心靈謀生———於是她立即付諸實踐。
她拒絕接受加在名字前的任何榮譽稱號，只允許人們在名字後綴上一點東西以示愛戴，就這樣她成爲一位不入教的牧師，走上講壇，把她偉大的心靈向那些需要的人們敞開。
在冬天和秋天，她把心帶給AME教徒和浸禮教徒，帶給聖潔教會教友和神聖者會教友，帶給救世主和贖罪者教會。不用人請，不穿聖袍，沒有塗膏，她讓自己偉大的心靈在人們面前搏動。天氣轉暖時，身後尾隨着所有劫後餘生的黑人男子、婦女和孩子，聖貝比·薩格斯把她偉大的心靈帶到“林間空地”———那是密林深處、小路盡頭的一塊寬敞的空地，只有野鹿和早先的開墾者纔會知道它的由來。每一個星期六下午，在酷暑中，她坐在空地上，而人們等在樹林裏。